Bryce's Wifey

The Abbey

2012-01-18T10:23:00.000-08:00

I love it here!

Bryce and I came here on Christmas Eve and I was meaning to post this a while ago and when I saw pictures I had to post.

There is an Abbey a little down the hill from where we live and it is great. My sister Laura found wanted to eat here for her birthday, so we all came here and the food was great. All the food is raised on the farm at the abbey and all the food is prepared by chefs in a beautiful rustic lodge.

Bryce and I decided to come here for Christmas Eve, we were going to go earlier but didn't have the chance because of our little Bear. It is beyond beautiful inside, so we nestled in the cute little lodge and I had a hot chocolate. It was the best hot chocolate yet.

Okay, so for an update, the weather has been nice. It is seemingly harder to get the belly down after pregnancy numero dos. I melt every time Bear looks at me. Smith is still angelic as ever and loves to touch Bear. I have a painting I am going to post soon, almost finished with it.

Why do people knock down Lemons. Like they call a bad car a lemon and when life hands you lemons make lemonade? I love lemons, you can slice them and put them in your water, make the most delicious desserts with them. Use the zest and juice for delicious chicken and seafood, you can put it soups and whatever. Lemons are great, just had to put my two cents in about lemons. So I guess I would call a bad car a papaya, (yucky papaya, don't like) and I guess when life hands you a papaya, give it away! (That's what I did on my mission)

The Bear and SMith movie.

2012-01-08T05:47:00.000-08:00

Here are some videos from this past month.

Let it Snow....

2011-12-20T05:24:00.000-08:00

(outside our window)

I never thought I would say this, but I love the snow.

Here, in Heidelberg.

I don't know why, but I think it's the fact that I have never been in Europe in places that it actually snows. It feels magical.

Life with Bear and Smith is great. It is so funny because I am constantly looking for signs of any sort of diffrence with Bear. I will tell Bryce, "He hasn't looked at me today...do you think he is alright?" and Bryce always reassures me everything is fine. Bear has been different than Smith. But since Smith has had newborn qualities his whole life, I think Bear and Smith are similar. Only time will tell. But so far, Bear can lift his head, he is not hypotonic, he opens his eyes, looks at me and around, and he can track things with his eyes. All I know, is that when I look at Smith, Bear and my Bryce, it is proof that God loves me. They are my gifts from Heavenly father. Life is a lot harder with two kids that can't walk, can't talk, need diaper changes, need baths everyday, need to be fed by me, and carried by me, but life is a lot fuller and happier too. Life always gets easier and always gets harder. I think I will focus on the easier things today.

Oh and by the way, yep, by many requests, The Kitchen Chronicles are back! I am cooking and blogging again yay!!!

This was so cool, Sarah Muller, a former investigator who got baptized from Bryce's mission, came to visit us. Her daughter was so cute and they were fun to have over. Do you like how blurry I am?

Happy 5th my Bryce!

2011-12-12T03:25:00.000-08:00

Happy Anniversary to me and my Bryce!!

The week of my due date, (which was November 16) I had a dream that I gave birth to our little Bear on our anniversary (which is November 18).

When I awoke from the dream, I was mad. I didn't want to share that date with anyone but Bryce. Even my unborn child, (at the time). I am a little obsessed with my husband and I look forward to our anniversary more than any other holiday in the year, because we have always stayed the night somewhere no matter what.

1st Anniversary- The Homestead Restort, Midway Utah, I LOVE MIDWAY!!

2nd Anniversary- The Marriot, Salt Lake City Utah, apparently the cleanest city in the world

3rd Anniversary- A private cabin above Heber, thanks to one of Bryce's students families

4th Anniversary- The Johnson Mill Bed & Breakfast, Midway Utah!!

5th Anniversary- Salem Hospital, Heidelberg Germany

What I thought would be bittersweet, turned out to be nothing but sweet. I loved giving birth on our anniversary. Two very special days of my life occurred on that blessed day. How lucky we are to share it with Bear, and Bear with us.

So, that being said, we finally actually celebrated our anniversary! Yeah.

We went out to eat at a thai restaurant on the main street that runs through old town. Then,

Bryce writes me a song every year and then puts on what he calls, "his favorite concert of the year," where he sings all of them for me. I cried and felt oh so special, then we watched a movie. Notting Hill. I love that movie. It was a night dipped in chocolate with a cherry on top. I love when all you are thinking about is that person you are with and how much they have changed your life for the better. And of course, always eating delicious food is a must on your anniversary.

Yeah for Awesome Husbands!!!

Me waiting with my buddies for the bus to come whisk us away to thai food...

Love him.

Now I understand people taking pictures at restaurants. It is a HUGE deal to get out with kids!!!!

the camera made this look so gross!!!!! but it was DELICIOUS! Pork satay

And if any of you want a delicious and easy holiday treat that will go over oh-so-well with any holiday feast. Try my freezer pumpkin cheesecake recipe. You can add a cup of chopped chocolate and make it freezer pumpkin chocolate chip cheesecake, you can add whipped cream and caramel topping and make it caramel pumpkin cheesecake, anyway you eat it it is a crowd pleaser. The best thing about this recipe is you don't bake it! Yes, so easy.

this recipe was adapted and created for my sister Lauras birthday. She wanted a cake with no eggs and little to no gluten. But the crust has a bit of gluten, that's okay, it's still a rich and delicious thing.

FREEZER PUMPKIN CHEESECAKE have mercy!

FOR THE CRUST
- 1-1/2 cups finely ground gram crackers
  1-1/2 cups toasted pecans, finely ground
  1/4 cup firmly packed brown sugar
  1/4 cup butter, melted

FOR THE FILLING

1 cup pumpkin puree
2/3 cup sugar
4 ounces mascarpone cheese (1/2 cup), room temperature
4 ounces cream cheese (1/2 cup), room temperature
2 ounces soft fresh goat cheese (1/4 cup), room temperature
1 tsp pumpkin pie spice
1 cup heavy cream

Directions

Make the crust: Coat a 9-inch springform pan with cooking spray; line bottom with a round of parchment. Stir together cookies, butter, sugar, and nuts, press evenly into bottom of pan. Refrigerate while making filling.
Make the filling: Beat pumpkin puree, 1/3 cup sugar, the cheeses, and pumpkin pie spice with a mixer on medium speed until very smooth, about 4 minutes. Whisk heavy cream and remaining 1/3 cup sugar until medium peaks form; fold into filling mixture, and spread evenly onto crust. Smooth top, and freeze until firm, at least 2 hours. Refrigerate for 45 minutes before serving. Place a cinnamon stick on top to garnish if desired.
Run a knife around edge of cake; release sides to remove from pan, and transfer cake to a serving platter.

Christmas Market

2011-12-04T07:12:00.001-08:00

Boy do they know how to celebrate Christmas in Heidelberg!!

The Christmas market in old town Heidelberg is BOOMING with Christmas goodies. They even flooded part of the street and made it into an ice skating rink.

After our first pediatrician appointment we decided to stop by the Christmas market, and I was dazzled. It was so cute to see Bryce pushing our babies. I love having two. Having multiple children is so fulfilling. I thought it would be stressful, (it is), but it is not the over riding emotion attached to multiples, there is a stronger sense of family, and a stronger desire for me to better. I don't know why, but I guess with these 3 amazing men in my life I have a lot to live up to. We had to come home from the Christmas market a little early... I am still recovering, and by the way, putting lavender essential oil in your bath water does wonders after birth, just so you know. Well, again, merry Christmas as I take you on a highlighted journey of the CHristmas market in old town Heidelberg.

I started out buying these delicious beauties, They were hot and singing to me.

Ready for the pediatrician? Europe is always fun for the trips we take using public transportation, never a dull moment.

They have delicious stands that sell brats, steak brochen, french fries....and so much more!

Fruit skewered and dipped in chocolate yumm, yes please.

Beautiful paper.

Germans know their Candy and Chocolate.

A Christmas MErry Go Round? Are you serious? This is so cool.

Loved these trinkets.

Hey Buddy! I'm sorry you got tired, your missing out!

boy number two, down.

I could just gobble these three boys up...yum yum yum. I love them so so much!!

This ceramic is made in Poland I think, anyway, my grandma is a huge fan of this particular ceramic and I think it is pretty awesome too. They had a huge stand of this beautiful ceramic and it made me miss my Grandma Smith!

Can I get that baking dish on the shelf please?

walking back to our bus stop....

Christmas Countdown Jar

2011-12-01T02:26:00.000-08:00

I love love love love love love love....did I say LOVE? CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This time of year is nostalgic and full of life. You would think the end of the year would be a little dreary and kinda sad, but it is the opposite.

So I decided to make a Countdown to Christmas Jar. Every little piece of paper has something to do until Christmas. Not anything huge, examples; make cookies, drink hot chocolate etc.... there are 24 days until Christmas and I am geared up to have a great time until then.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Merry Christmas!

My Birth in Germany

2011-11-29T01:01:00.000-08:00

Some of you have already seen pictures of me in the hospital and commented saying I looked beautiful right after I had my baby, well, during the birth I was not a beauty. It was a gird your loins and throw your sweaty hair in a rubberband affair.

The German Midwives were beautiful and magnificent. They were dedicated to me having a vaginal birth. My first birth was a C-Section and I was determined to have a natural birth this time. My midwives were on board with me as we worked together.

When I walked into the hospital going through contractions with Smith about 3 years ago, I was dialated to an 8 and quickly was a 9. I was violent and moaning and groaning, they opted for an epidural to calm me down so the baby would drop. No luck, what ended up dropping was Smiths heart rate and in I went for an emergency c-section. It was not planned and unexpected. Bryce was sad he couldn't be in the operating room for very long, he got to hold my hand for a little bit and then leave as soon as the baby was out. Even though Smith is amazing, and we did feel God's presence in the operating room that day, there was a sense of a missing experience that we were looking for and didn't find.

I walked into the hospital dialated at a 2 this time with Bear. And not too different than with Smith, with in 45 minutes I was at a 7, and after getting out of their birthing tub, I was at a 9. But the baby's head would not drop. Just like Smith. I was stuck birthing at a 9 for hours, screaming, and moaning and groaning. It wasn't too long until the midwife came in and said I needed an epidural to calm me down so the baby could drop (I was also screaming for one, so don't think I was an angel, I recall clawing the nurses legs and yelling "I am going to die!"). I got the epidural and when I was in the united states and got the epidural for Smith it was so powerful that you could just watch your contraction pass you by. But they did a more local epidural on me so I could feel everything, I was still walking around the room and feeling pain during contractions so I could push. Just dialed down a notch so I could think. But no luck, the baby's head would not drop. This is where the nurse looked me in straight in the face, ( I had my eyes closed for most of my birth) and said, "Beth you need to push as hard as you can or you will have to have a c-section, we are going to use the vacuum on you okay?" Now, I think in the U.S. using vacuum extraction is ancient history, but in europe it is very common.

There were about 5 midwives at the other end, one yelling in German, the others in english, to PUSH!!!!

After a double episiotomy and about 10 minutes of pushing my brains out, little Baron Bryce Taylor was BORN! I did it! A long sigh of relief came out of my mouth and my sweet wonderful Bryce was overwhelmed with joy as he hugged all the midwives, cut his son's cord, and wept with ecstasy. Bryce later told me it looked like a land mine went off down there.

Having experienced both kinds of births, having a vaginal birth is, in my opinion is the way to go. I loved the feeling of pushing him out. I loved knowing Bear and I worked hard together and we did it. We did it buddy. You and I. Me and you. I know we will continue to work together in life and be best friends. I love you Bear and Smith, you two are the apples of my eye.

This is me bout 3 weeks before my birth with my sister and her family, Laura came out to Germany to be my Doula, she was amazing, she had drinks with straws, frozen maxipads for after birth and essential oils and teas. She is amazing.

This picture is perfect because we had Bear on our anniversary....

Gak

2011-10-30T22:17:00.000-07:00

Does anyone remember Gak?

The older kids play dough. This post has nothing to do gak, but I did run into some yaks the other day and it made me think of gak and how silly that stuff is.....anyway, Smith and I were on an explorers walk when we heard cowbells in the distance, me, thinking it was cows got excited and told Smith "we are going to see some cows Smith!" And then we turned the corner and it turned out to be Yaks! I just had to laugh because seeing a yak on a walk is the last thing to expect. Smith liked them, I put Smith really close to one to see if Smith would get scared but he just smiled and laughed.

Also I got some knew head shots for America's Top next Model. I am going to be submitting them of Bryce. Which one do you think is the best?

My Friend

2011-10-22T00:18:00.000-07:00

I have a little friend named Smith.

He is cute and fun.

Sometimes I get caught up in the "care" of Smith and tend to neglect the "play" with him. We had the best day today.

After finishing Anna Karenina, I put the book down and made a resolution to play with Smith the rest of the day. He loved it, I loved it. He truely is an Angel, really, I don't know anyone with as many celestial trates as my little Smith. I am hoping on getting him into a german pre-school soon, I hope he learns German so that when I scold him or tell him to do something he can say, "Nein Mutter!"

That would be great.

My Season

2011-10-14T12:16:00.000-07:00

Everyone and everything has a season.

What is this season of mine?

What is there to learn right now in my life?

I decided that my season right now is being a mother. At home (u.s.a) I was lucky enough to have friends and family close, (which is wonderful). But here I will not have that everyday. I am living pretty much in the woods while Bryce is studying all day long. So what does my day consist of? What did it used to consist of? I used to plan a day date with a friend or family member, bring Smith along and shoot the breeze. I can make friends, I think that I have proven that to Heavenly Father, but now I think I need to focus on being a mom. A real mom. Not that SMith does not provide the opportunity to be a mother, he does in a different way. But now that I am going to have another little boy in my little home in Deutchland, I think I need to hone my motherly skills and not try to do things to get away from being a mother.

When I was younger I used to play house....actually not that much younger,, I think I stopped playing house when I was fourteen. I was a late bloomer in life. Anyway, whenever we were deciding who would be the mom, the sister, the baby, the dog, you know the normal domestic beings. I never wanted to be the mom. Never. I thought that sounded like the most boring roll to pretend to be, I always wanted to be the teenager or the baby or maybe the annoying dog, but never the mother. Now I find myself sometimes feeling the same way. Except, that it's not pretend anymore. I cannot escape motherhood like I could when I played house.

Motherhood didn't choose me, I chose motherhood.

And I am going to choose motherhood while I am here in Germany. I remember when I went visiting teaching before I came out here and I was talking to a lady from my ward and I asked her,"how are your kids so good." And she said,"they better be! I gave up so many day dates with my girlfriends because of naps and rides and sports." That really hit me, because I feel like I have never given up that stuff. It is time, my season to learn about motherhood. So any advice from all you mothers would be appreciated.

Discovery

2011-09-16T11:46:00.000-07:00

I love to discover things.

I love to explore.

I even dare say, I love to travel.

Today we did all three. We walked down a beautiful street right in the heart of Heidelberg, that has a million shops, and when I say a million....I might be exagerating, but when you are there it feels like a million. With street perfmormers, old buildings, restaurants, clothing, books, Heidelberg University, You name it they got it! So I took random pictures of things that caught my eye.

Smith loved his adventure too. He is eagerly anticipating his baby brother, I think that we have telekaneses and he is excited for him to come. There is a part of me that is nervous, Bryce and I were talking on the train on our way to down town, and we are both excited for a new baby, but not expecting everything to be normal. I mean, it is so hard for me to imagine normal....that seems totally NOT normal for us.

We went to our first prenatal visit today and it was so nice. We actually got a 3-D image of our little boy. ANd I fell even more in love with him! I am so excited for everything! The birth, the baby, the adventure of being a mother of two here in this beautiful country! Yeah!

I love all the bikes in Heidelberg! MOst of them have cute carriers and baskets on them.

A cute stool out of a little shop that I thought was quite creative. It was cover in shells and buttons and random art.

Me and my two boys....one inside the tummy and one outside.

I know I have posted another picture of the bridge and castle, but this picture was so clear, and it was just too beautiful not to post.

So many fancy scarves! I just love it....

I have no idea what these would have tasted like, but they looked delicious.

It's hard to tell, but the flower design on the ceiling of the cathedral was breath-taking

Bryce and SMithy in the Cathedral.

I loved the colors nd design of this window in the Cathedral.

And last but not least I FINALLY had a duner. That is not how you spell it in German, but it is close to how you say it, and it was absolutely delicious! Was not dispointed in the slightest. I feel sorry to all who will not have an authentic Turkish Duner in their lifetime. IT was truely magnificence in my mouth.

Sand and Guitars

2011-09-10T13:20:00.000-07:00

Not the clearest picture of the river that runs through Heidelberg, but it still stole my heart. It is undeniably beautiful here. Today I had the treat of going to the park and letting Smith play in the sand.... boy did he have fun. Two little boys were running around, yelling in German, and one of them almost hit Smith (accidentally) but Sarah came to the rescue and told the German boys to be careful and play somewhere else, (at least think that is what she said?)

It is the little things in life that make everyday so special, today something that was special was eating outside with Mike and Sarah. We had eggplant parmesan, made with Gouda Cheese instead of parmesan (Which I thought was better) So I guess you would call it eggplant gouda....right? It was delicious.

Bryce played his guitar on the streets of Heidelberg and tried to see how much money he would make, and he made quite a bit for his first time at street performing in Germany. Although he has performed on the street before with Elaine, it felt new to him. He did say he missed his musical sould mate, since this is where they met. Oh Elaine, I have thought about you while I have been here in Germany and pictured you as a missionary here, You probably rocked it out here just like you are doing now. Anyway, I have to end on the same note I left off of last entry....It's beautiful here.

Tschuss!!!!

I love this thick bearded man

The beautiful Streets of Heidelberg

2011-09-08T23:55:00.000-07:00

THe BEautiful Streets of Heidelberg Germany, and I am not just visiting, I am living here. Boy do I feel lucky. Someone once told me there is no such thing as luck, it all translates to blessings, so in other words, I feel blessed to be here. Our trip was pleasant. Traveling with a son with special needs sure gives you the golden ticket in the sky world. We pre-boarded, got priority seating, had special assistance, even when arriving in Germany we didn't have to wait in the immigration line, we were taken right to the front and checked in and were on our way. I am currently eating Musli with lemon yogurt enjoying the view of German houses and lots of green trees. This will be an adventure never to forget and I am looking forward to it. We are still jet lagged so excuse me for not being a bard and really serenading you all with my words but I think I am going to take a nap with my son now, so enjoy the pictures, they are the end of our trip to the beginning, out of order..... I am back and excited to blog again!

Scentsy

2010-12-19T15:22:00.000-08:00

It's hip, it's fun....it's Scentsy!

Oh dear, Now don't get me wrong, I am not an MLMer? I don't know if that is how you say it, but I will never sell things to people for them to sell things and so on..... For all you who are involved in MLM's then congratulations and I hope you are succesful, but don't come knocking on my door for me to be one too. Love you, but no thanks. Although I am not involved in selling items from MLM's I am in the business of buying the products from them, with no strings attached. I love the products, from Noni juice, Xango juice, Mona Vi, Scentsy and maybe those energy chocolates as well. Pretty cool stuff. And I am now enjoying a beautiful scentsy light on my table with a delicious scent of wassail, which is apples and oranges simmering cinnamon , nutmeg and clove. Delicious. I just want to drink my house. Yumm.

oh yeah.. and I am doing a home-made project that I can't divulge until after Christmas for a family member, but I will post a picture of the lovely project, and will be selling copies on Etsy after Christmas.

Merry Christmas xoxo

Christmas Goodies

2010-12-07T19:01:00.000-08:00

So I finally did it. I made Christmas goodies and boy are they good! I got to knead dough and cut little shapes out, and use the kitchen of my lovely sister in law Tasia. It was so fun.

That is not why I am writing this post because I realize that Christmas Goodies are your family and friends and the remembrence that Christ is alive. He was born on this earth and continues to live this day! What a delicious Christmas Goodie it is to feel the love of Christ. So I will feast on delicious peppermint bark while I feast on the love of Christ. This time of year is supposed to be delicious in everyway.

I Saw.

2010-11-11T19:24:00.000-08:00

Today I saw, 5 old men running.

Today I saw a 16 year old boy helping his grandmother across a busy street.

Today I saw a man wearing a backwards hat, chains hanging from his pockets, and baggy clothes, zipping up his little daughters' coat and told her it was bath time when they got home.

Today I saw my husband rest his head on my shoulder during his lunch break and asked me to stay 5 more minutes.

Today I decided to let these people change me.

Today I want to be a better person because of them.

Today I realized that people are art. When you study them and look deeper you appreciate them more. You love them more. When you find out the history of an art piece, you are more drawn to it, it is more interesting.

People are art to me.

Beautiful, and intricate. And the best part is, they are all God's creations. Beautiful pieces of art.

Today I am going to paint a picture, with dinner on the table, a kiss on the forhead to Smith, and a snuggle session with Bryce. That sounds like a beautiful painting.

2010-11-09T19:29:00.000-08:00

I ran a 1/2 Marathon.

At the beginning of the race I saw a man pushing his handicapped son in a wheel chair, and I thought of Smith. And then I changed the reason for finishing the race. I told my self, " This is for Smith." It is true, he will never understand what we do for him in this life. While I was running across the finish line thinking of my smiling little boy, his mind is far far away in never land, watching mermaids swim and the lost boys crowding around him to play a game.

I am more and more grateful for him as each day passes.

Bryce and I were talking about our friends and family who have children. And we both realized we don't know what it is like to raise a child. We don't tell Smith what to do. We pretty much do everything for him. No, we are not raising Smith. Smith is raising us. He teaches us to do things, he gives us the social cues to feed and comfort him. Yes, Smith is Raising me. I needed it. I needed to grow up. I had to whip my butt into gear and experience something painful, happy, sad, wonderful, amazing, and very hard. I guess there is that quote that has shown up in mormon pop culture that some claim the savior said, but he really didn't, " I never said is would be easy, I only said it would be worth it." I like it for my situation. Though the savior never said it, I feel he is saying it to me, every day. Because it is hard everyday, and it is definitly worth it. It is worth it when he smiles at me, when he laughs so hard he can't breathe, when he sits up all by himself and when he visits me in my dreams and talks to me. I love my Smith. I can't say it enough.

my mom took these pictures of smith the other night, she is in town right now and I am loving it!!!

this is me entering a recipe contest, I had to submit a photo of me and the recipe...I didn't want to do it, but the food turned out good.

My Buddy and Me

2010-10-13T08:38:00.000-07:00

I just love my buddies

Basking in your Child's Light

2010-09-28T10:24:00.000-07:00

There are many times I try to figure my son out.

I think, why is he doing that? Is this a symptom? What is he doing? Why? How? And so on...

I am sure no matter what our children have, from Angelman's to ADD, we are trying to figure our children out.

The other day, I was watching Smith as he was laying on his back babbling, and rolling, the first thing that came to my head was, "is this what most children with Angelman's do?" Then I quickly let that thought go, because I realized wasn't enjoying my child. I was busy being caught up in figuring him out and wasn't simply enjoying him. So I laid down beside him and tickled him and had fun, with no thought of any symptom or anything. I was basking in Smith's light. And how bright it is! I think as mothers we can all be surprised of how much light our children give off. And how much we need it!

Of course there are times where it is totally appropriate to try and "figure them out", but every once in a while, just let it all go and have some fun.

oh... and by the way, Smith is sitting up with no assistance for about a minute now... pretty exciting!

a sweet pic of daddy kissing little Smith on his way into an brain MRI.

we love Smith.... and each other, isn't that awesome?

Angel Man

2010-09-19T10:06:00.000-07:00

As of two days ago we know.

It feels good to know. Finally know. What am I talking about?....... it feels GREAT!

Dr. Botto (Smith's Geneticist) called me and told me, "the search is over." Smith's 15th chromosome is missing which means he has a rare genetic disorder called, get this, Angelman's Syndrome. Now, anyone who knows Smith can testify to the fact he is an angel, and apparently these special people with this syndrome have an "angel like" demeanor. It just so happens that the man who founded this disorder, his last name is Angelman. As Bryce and I read about his disorder, tears came to our eyes because we were actually reading real symptoms, we were saying things like, "Thats why! I get it." It feels so good to know, really know. We always were asking what Smith was smiling at, what he was laughing at, and why he was happy all the time. All these things are traits of a person affected with Angelman's.

Well, Smith. Your dad and I are in it for the long hall. We will always be here for you, to take care of you and enjoy you, for the rest of your life....you can count on that! So here's to our Angel... Smith David taylor. It is a truly momentous occasion.

Angelman syndrome - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Happy Birthday Smith!

2010-05-10T11:24:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday was technically his birthday, but I was too busy to write anything to him.

Smith I have a little something to tell you......

When you were born, your Daddy said "he felt God in the room"

You have a smile that lights up the whole room

You love to put your hands in your mouth and kick your feet high in the air

When we spin you around in circles you laugh so hard you can't breath

You love mashed bananas

You have daddy's dark eyelashes and my color of hair

You have parents that love and adore you

Happy Birthday Smith WE LOVE YOU!

A Story

2010-05-07T13:11:00.001-07:00

I love stories.

Always have, always will.

In fact, my Bryce just got me the complete Grimm's Brothers book of fairy tales, and I have been devouring it ever since. Everything from drops of blood talking to princesses and lost fingers that point in the direction of it's killers. Yes, grim as they are, I love em. I do love Hans Christian Anderson's as well, but there is something about the Grimm's Brothers tales that I tend to love even more.

Anyway, I want to tell you a touching story. And it's true.

The story is about a little boy named Smith. He is so strong inside but doesn't have the strength outside to do things like other boys his age. Doctors are trying to find anything they can do to help him, as they poke and prod, Smith can't help but cry, but Mom and Dad are there this time, holding his legs down and his hands down. After his grueling day, guess what Smith wants to do? He wants to smile and be spun around. Mom remembers the doctor asking her the question, "Is Smith aggressive?" Mom chuckles, "What do you mean aggressive?" Doctor replies, "Does he bite anyone, or does he show aggressive behavior at all?" Mom and Dad chuckle this time. Any one who knows Smith, knows he is the kindest, most gentle and smiley little boy. And he has another secret, there are many people praying for him and fasting for him all the time, and that makes him happy, it makes him stronger too. So the end of this story is still yet to be told, but I will have you know, it ends happily ever after, indeed.

(This is Brooke Lee, C-jones' (my bestie) sister holding Smith in California)

Bread of life

2010-04-16T12:04:00.000-07:00

My mother is visiting this week.

and I am making bread!

First time ever.

As a mormon housewife, this is a hard fact to face, seeing as probably every woman on my block has a loaf of home-made bread waiting on their counter.

Well, I always have adored my mom's homemade bread and I am going to learn how to make it. But first, of course, I went with a more gourmet and complicated recipe.

French baguettes.

Yumm... the crusty french bread sound, and the toast...delish.

Okay, enough about food.

Smith is going to get babysat over night for the first time ever. I am so glad my mamma came up to do this little act of service for my Bryce and I. We haven't spent a single night away from him since he's been born. I know this is pretty common for most parents not to spend the night away from their kids, so don't think that I am saying it's totally crazy that we haven't. But the fact is, she offered to babysit him over night and I gladly said "yes!"

Today is the love of my life's Birthday! Yeah Bryce you are 28...and how cute are you? I just love you sweatheart, there is no one in this world that will ever take your place, as I have seriously put so many times before, "we are soul-mates!" and then you laugh, and then I get a sad look on my face and I say,"but seriously, we are." And seriously sweatheart, we are.

You are now 28, and older than me until July then I will be 28 as well, but until then you can boss me around and say, "well, I am older than you so you have to do it."

So cheers to today... and all the rest that we will have together!

On the Serious Side

2010-03-23T10:33:00.000-07:00

I sound excited when I talk about Smith's new discovery.

He has possible methylmalonic acidemia.

We don't know for sure if it is, but It might be. A part of me is excited, a part of me is scared, and a part of me doesn't know what to do. I have lived with the fact that Smith David Taylor is a medical mystery for two years, and to know a diagnosis is awesome, everything I asked for. I pray for it to be this genetic disorder because they can actually treat it. There are a lot of aspects to this genetic disease that are hard to face.

They can't undo any damage that is already done. (which is unkown)

And Bryce and I have a one in four chance of having another one with the same disease. (high risk)

So, in short there is a lot racing through my mind. Here are some thoughts I would like to share.

1. I am grateful for Smith's innocence and happy countenance, that I am sure he will have forever.

2. For some reason, I was chosen for this calling in life. Maybe I accepted it before this life, but it has taken me a while to accept it in this one. And now that I feel I have accepted it, things are more peaceful at my core and I am more myself.

3. I have an amazing support group. My husband being number one, he is too amazing it makes me choked up writing about him in any way. And my amazing family that is always praying for him, fasting for him, treating him like he is special but still just one of the grand kids. My friends that listen to me like there is nothing else to do in the world, and take time out of there busy schedule to not be so busy for a moment and spend time with me and Smith.

4. Realizing there are true doctors out there that care... I mean really really CARE. I heart them.

5. I love life! Golly gee whiz....it's a fantastic journey that sure has it's ups and downs! Enjoy the experience of feeling something! We are supposed to feel sadness, sorrow, loss, anger in this life, it's inevitable, because with out those emotions there would be no happiness, joy, love, glee, glory, fun, laughter! I guess if you want a placid life you can avoid feeling any of the negatives, but the positives will go more unnoticed. It's just a part of life, and life is, well, AMAZING!

I love my little Smith. He is always being so cute in some way, I can't help but squeeze his little cheeks and squeeze his little body close to mine everyday. He is one of my favorite joys in life. I thank my heavenly father for giving me such a beautiful little boy.

TULIPS!

2010-03-10T09:06:00.000-08:00

We bought our house in October.

I had no idea that our little yard would bring us early spring flowers!

Tulips!

Undeniably my favorite flower. I do fancy the orange tulips best, but any color will do.

Tomorrow I am taking little Smitty into his Neurologist to try to diagnose him properly. I have mixed feelings on this subject. I am scared to medicate him because of the side effects, on the other hand, I would like to see him grow and learn. If the medication can help him develop then I think I am willing to take a chance. I have accepted Smith's disability in my life. My sister called me the other day and told me that a friend of hers lost her fight to cancer. She was only 31 and had 3 children and a husband. I pondered and morned for her family on this earth, with out a mother and a wife. My heart goes out to that family. Then I thought of my current situation and looked down at Smith who was kicking and smiling on the floor.

I don't have cancer.

I have a son, a happy son, with disabilities.

He is a blessing. And I didn't fully realize that until my sister told me that story. I am blessed to have Smith. He has helped me see the world differently, helped me to love differently.

No more woe is me.

Happy me.

Let the good times roll, (and Smith too...)

Let the tulips bloom and I am ready for you SPRING! Oh, so ready!

RESULTS

2010-02-26T09:21:00.000-08:00

Dr. Sokonju called me yesterday.

She said she had results for Smith.

I was skeptical, thinking, "well, another test, with out any sign of a problem."

She told me she was glad we did the test because it was.....ABNORMAL!

I was so happy! I have been waiting for a test to come out abnormal, through all the testing they have done and now WHAM! We got one. This means they have something to go off of, she says.

So the test. It tested his brain waves, seeing if he had any seizures or sensory disorders. Dr. Sokonju said that because the test was abnormal we have a paved road to go down and hopefully find some concrete answers.

Whatever Smith has, I hope we can help him even more. He is such a dear boy, he literally smiles all day long. How can I not smile back? He rolls over about 3-5 times a day, and he touches his feet lightly with his fingers. He's my little buddy.

Everyone adores Smith.

Smith, I adore you. I love you. Get better soon. I am here to help every minute of everyday.

love, Mom.

2010-02-18T09:28:00.000-08:00

(Smith wearing halloween Pj's in February)

Smith rarely matches.

Sometimes I care, like for church and for other events. But for the most part it's stripes and camo, or patterns that clash. I don't purposely seek clothes that don't match, I just grab a onsie, a shirt, pants and some socks. And if they happen to match then HALLELUJAH! One time our friends looked at Smith and said,"Beth, Smith matches way too much today." They later informed me that they look forward to Smith's outfits, and think it's cute.

Well, Smith matched yesterday for his appointment. For me anyway. He wore a celery green polo onsie with jeans. He did wear red socks with this outfit. But they are just socks right?

So when Smith looked like Elliot on E.T. with wires stuck to his head and chest, the nurse looked at Smith's outfit (me thinking that she is admiring how much he matched) looked at his socks and chuckled. I think she thought it was cute that he clashed so much. Red is opposite to green on the color wheel. Why didn't I think to put on some nice white socks that go with everything?

So today, he is going to wear Christmas pj's. Those always match.

And are always in style, no matter the time of year....right?

Avatar...... wow.

2010-02-16T14:19:00.000-08:00

(I look just like her don't you think? All I need is black braids and blue skin... how do I do that?)

The reason I am writing about the movie Avatar is because, after you have children, going to the movies is a HUGE event. So of course, being a huge event for my Bryce and I..... I have to write about this movie.

Here it goes.

DANCES WITH WOLVES MEETS FERNGULLY.

The eye-candy was amazing. The graphics were amazing. The 3-D glasses were awesome (Bryce would look at me and pull his glasses down his nose and wink at me during the movie, it was cute.)

Over all I felt the story line was lacking. How could a former marine master the art of being an avatar after 3 months, and do it better than the whole tribe of native blue people? A little unbelievable. But, why did I leave the theater feeling entertained, and getting my moneys worth? I don't know. But what I do know, is I want to fly on one of those cool looking dragon birds someday. That would be fun.

Has anyone heard of the support groups across the country for people that are depressed because life isn't like it is on the planet for the Avatars.

I am glad life isn't like it is with the Avatars. Granted. I would like one of those killer bodies that those Avatars have.

I like life, it is beautiful, and God created the whole thing. And there are plenty of movies that celebrate this beautiful world. I can't think of any right now, but there are. And who needs a movie to know how amazing this world is... right? Just going on a run the other day I looked up and saw the Wasatch Mountains covered in snow with the tops of the mountains sheltered with misty clouds. I just smiled and breathed in the cold air. It was nice. And beautiful.

So anyway, back to the movie.

It made me sad that people think America is made up of stupid meat heads that only know how to pump iron and blow stuff up. Also that America only cares about money, not life.

Why does James Cameron get to label us all as plastic polluting losers? Well, I am lucky to be a citizen of this country and I am happy that plastic is around because it saves lives everyday. I am so happy that we have an army defending our country everyday, and I am happy to say I support our troops. I just shriveled at what the army thought of the movie Avatar. And if it means anything to anyone that has served our country, I am sorry that you had to see it.

When all the hoora is done and over with about the movie it will be just as dumb as Titanic. Well, maybe not as quite. I still kind of liked the magical world....of course.

Hello

2010-02-11T10:20:00.001-08:00

(this is called a light box... yes scary! one of smith's therapists gave it to him and it comes with all different shapes and colors.... boy did I have fun. I rummaged through all the accessories and found these shapes.... really what were they thinking, are her nostrils off to anyone?)

Wow... it's been, well.... WAy too long!

Smith is doing so well, he started to roll over and that has made a huge SMILE on my face.

He is going in for some more procedures next Wednesday. Good ole' Primary Children's, gotta love that place. They are measuring his brain waves. Doesn't that sound like Science fiction to anyone? Sometimes Smith's life feels like Science fiction. I saw an episode of a for real nerd alien show (yes, admittedly so, I love Alien shows) and the subject matter was about a society of people living on a different planet where all the children are born with so much intelligence that when the children reach about 8 years old, give all of their knowledge to the adults, leaving the children vegetable like.

I promise, this is going somewhere.

I thought for a moment about Smith, though not vegetable like at all, that maybe he gave his knowledge to someone else before he came down to earth, maybe, not totally possible, but it's a nice thought.

As for me, I am getting ready for Valentines Day. A holiday I really wasn't interested or involved my self in until I met my Bryce. Now I LOVE IT! Chocolate dipped strawberries, yummy dinner for two and a moment just for "us". Us and always is our motto, we have it written under a framed picture of us in our home. I love it. Instead of "me and now", it is "us and always."

Well, this is Beth, signing off.... and I promise to return, very soon, none of this two month break business.....

Ode to Stay-At-Home Moms

2009-12-14T09:19:00.001-08:00

Sometimes I take being a stay-at-home mom for granted.

It is the funnest thing in the world.

And I will tell you why:

1.I am the co-CEO of my life and house.

2.I get to pretend I am different kind of animals to entertain Smith.

3.I can eat chips and cheese whenever I want.

4.I can read any kind of book, wether it be a pop-up book, or The Odyssey(my current fav)

5.I can shower at 10:00am and walk around my house with my hair wet for hours, and I don't feel pressure from co-workers to look like a million bucks.....but sometimes Smith will give me a look like, "mom, you look like a homeless woman with wet hair, I think you should get changed." When I see that look, I change immediately and probably put mascara on for fun.

6.I can create things, write books, draw pictures, refurbish D.I. items, read peoples blogs, read scriptures, cook, make elaborate grocery lists (ridiculously detailed), read cook books cover to cover, attempt to sew and work out.

7.Love Smith and watch him grow. See what he sees and learn what he learns.

8.Knowing that Bryce wants me home more than anywhere or any work place in the world.

9.Feeling like a domestic goddess

10.And learning that Enough is all you need.

These are just some of the fun reasons why I love being a stay at home mom. I seriously couldn't imagine a better place for me. Some day I want to start my career when my youngens are not so young. But not today. Today I am going to roll on the floor and make silly faces to my sweet little boy. Today, I am going to be a mom and wife. It's going to be a good day.

I Got One

2009-12-03T09:44:00.000-08:00

Last night, to my dismay, I woke up to find Smith covered in throw up and hives.

Yeah, joys of mother-hood.

Poor little boy. I felt so sorry for him. We currently have our hot water turned off due to some remodeling, so i couldn't give him a bath. I just heated up some water on the stove and dabbed a wash cloth in the water, then washed off his face and shoulders. I yelled from Smith's room.

"Sweet heart. Come in here and look at Smith. I am worried!" I was worried. Underneath the lovely throw-up was big red and white hives and Smith was itching them like crazy.

"Can you go to the store and get some baby benidryl for me?" I asked. Hoping it wouldn't be inconvenient for him at midnight seeing he had to get up at six.

"Yeah." He just got his wallet and went to the store. He ended up calling me from the costumer service counter."Umm... the baby benidryl says not to give it to kids under the age of 2?"

So I told him to call me back in five minutes.

You test a lot of people's loyalty at midnight when you call them on the telephone.

First I called my Mom. No answer. Then I called my mother-in-law. No answer. Then I called my sister who lives in North Carolina. No answer. Then I called my mom again. No answer. So I called my Dad's cell phone. "What's up?" Yay! My Mom answered.

"Mom, Smith threw up everywhere and has hives, Bryce is at the store and is wondering what to do because the bottle of benidryl says it's only for kids 2-4 years old?"

"OKay, just give him under the lowest dose. He will be fine."

"Thanks Mom. Go back to bed. Love ya bye."

So to make a long story short. My Bryce came home with Baby Benidryl and SMith was fast asleep by the time Bryce got back. I hugged my Bryce tight as he walked through the door.

"Thank you so much. You will be blessed!"

He looked at me and said,"I don't want to be blessed anymore, I want Smith to be blessed."

I thought that was so sweet. And I thought,"I got one. I got a good one." a husband that is.

Call Waiting

2009-12-01T11:02:00.000-08:00

I am currently on call waiting for the CHIP office, while I am writing this.

All I can say is, Elevator Music.

Anyway, I think Black Friday is totally weird. I wonder why they call it black friday? I usually like to relax the day after Thanksgiving, in a comfortable chair, and think about all the frantic shoppers while I am enjoying my vacation. But this Black Friday, I shopped. And it was fun.

I only went to one store.

IKEA.

I think IKEA is fun. It kind of feels like an airport to me. When you first walk in there is an escalator that takes you up and you kind of don't know what to do for a second. Then after you get your stuff, you have to walk through their stock items, which the ceiling could totally pass as high as an airport. It's huge. Okay, so then you get to the check out and it literally feels like you will have to take off your shoes and put them in a little tub and get wanded by security. But you don't have to do that. It just feels like it. I don't know why, maybe it's the smell of cinnamon rolls as you leave, or the plastic that guards the cashier.

Anyway.

All I ended up getting was material. You can buy it by the yard, and they have a ton of fun patterns!! I am planning on making pillows from this gorgeous stuff and I am excited. What did you do on Black Friday?

Happy Anniversary to Me and Yikes Stripes!

2009-11-18T11:13:00.000-08:00

isn't he cute...? Gosh I am a lucky girl.

Today is the day My Bryce and I got married. Three years ago. November 18 2006. It was a fall wedding and so beautiful. I remember walking out of the bride room in the Timpanogos Temple all ready to walk out and see everyone greet us newly weds. It was the first time Bryce saw me in my wedding dress. His eyes got so big and he smiled like I had never seen him smile before. He said, "you look gorgeous, you are so beautiful." He had me spin in a circle. I felt like a princess. And he still makes me feel like a princess to this day.

The Cake you see at the top is the bottom of our wedding cake. Our actual wedding cake. And three years later we are eating it. It is still frozen, so hopefully it will thaw out before tonight!!

After 2 weeks, of painting pretty much everything in our entire house, we are done, for now. I painted my dream of stripes on the wall. I have always wanted to do this, and finally owning a home can allow you some fun decorating ideas you have collected over the years. I am so happy!

Spinal Tap

2009-11-12T11:11:00.000-08:00

As I walked into Primary Childerens Hospital in Salt Lake City I felt a little panic inside of me and I didn't feel too well, mother nature decided to pay me a little visit as I walked in holding my son. Don't worry the gift shop always provides woman products for emergency, so I was okay. But still, having to deal with that and then having your son go in for a spinal tap, an EMG, a G.I. scope and blood samples isn't what I call "ideal". First they couldn't find a vain to put the needle into for the anesthesia, so he was getting poked all over and just screaming. Poor little little. I felt like screaming too, I kind of did on the inside.

They took him in the procedure room and as he was in there, I walked around the hospital a bit. Watching children that were 8 in hospital gowns and no hair. And little ones with large casts on.

But it felt good to see them being taken care of. When Bryce and I were first at Primary Children's right after a neurology appointment. My Bryce and I had to wait in a room to get a blood sample for SMith. And in this room there was a grown boy, about fifteen years old, probably 150 pounds, in a wheel chair just looking up at the ceiling and smiling. It looked as though he had a condition, I didn't know what it was, maybe down syndrome, but he couldn't move, talk, walk, or look anywhere else but up. And the sweetest thing I had ever seen made tears drop on my lap. His grandma was holding his hand, she was a skinny woman. I watched her slide him out of this special wheel chair and hold him on her lap, he looked huge and awkward to hold, but she didn't care, she sang to him and smiled at him and talked to him, and laughed with him and rocked him and put her head on his and she smiled as well.

I looked over and saw my Bryce just staring, you really couldn't help but watch, it was amazing. But I knew what he was thinking.

He saw Smith in that boy.

He saw that as Smith's future. I held Bryce's hand tight and later asked him if that is what he was thinking. He said, "yes", and it was hard for him. We don't know what the future is for our son. We don't know what he will be capable of doing. Only a few results came back from the tests, and all they could tell us was "I am very concerned about your son", I liked hearing someone else is concerned. Thank you Doctor Sukonju and all the other staff at Primary children's.

Stephanie Nielson

2009-11-02T21:19:00.001-08:00

I read the Nie Nie Dialogues.

And I love them.

For all of you who do love the Nie Nie Dialogues then you love the author of them.

Stephanie Nielson.

I have a little story to tell.

My Bryce and I were driving back home tonight from Grandma Smith's (you know, Monday night we always have family home evening with her) and my Bryce said, "Oh, we need to get some Milk." He innocently said we would go to Allen's, but I suggested we just stop by the BYU creamery instead because it was right on our way. He agreed. He dropped me off to go in the store while he waited in the parking lot for me. And I don't know why I thought this, but as I walked in the creamery I thought,"What if Nie Nie was in here right now?" I walked straight to the milk and guess who was right next to the milk? Stephanie Nielson. I am not a star struck person and if I saw Cameron Diaz in a store I would probably not say anything to her and tell everyone about it. But Nie Nie is different. I basically read her blog every week and when she was in Coma I read her blog archives and it really genuinely inspired me to be a better mom and wife.

So I decided to just do it. I wanted to thank her. I walked up to her and tapped her on the shoulder and as soon as I started to talk tears welled up in my eyes and I could hardly muster up a word. So I said, with a shaky voice, tears, and a deep breath.

"Hi Stephanie, I just wanted to tell you I read your blog, and thank you so much....." cry cry cry.

Guess what that Angel did? She gave me a big hug. Not just an acquaintance side obligation hug. It was a warm nice sweet embrace. And of course it made me cry more. Then she said

"Thank you so much, I was having a bad day, so I really needed that."

Oh my gosh could this woman be more of a saint? She is amazing, seriously.

Then she asked me my name. I said,"Beth", then she repeated it and said,"Thanks Beth."

"No, Thank you Stephanie Nielson."

I walked to the front of the store, bought my milk and hurried in the car. My sweet Bryce was confused why I came back with milk and a puffy tear filled face! I told him what happened and he smiled and said,"that's awesome sweetheart."

It was awesome. And now, I'd like to think we are friends. She is nicer then you would ever imagine.

Thanks Stephanie.

www.nieniedialogues.blogspot.com

Confessions

2009-11-02T11:07:00.001-08:00

Confession #1- I have only taken baths since I moved into the new house. I know some are not Bath people, but I definitely am.

Confession #2- I started listening to Christmas Music. I once had a conversation with a close friend and she said she hated it
when people started to celebrate Christmas as early as September. Well, my friend, I might not have started
decorating right now, but I am enjoying Mo Tab's Handel's Messiah and Amy Grant's Christmas and I love Chris
Martin's version of "Have yourself a Merry little Christmas" There is so much beautiful Christmas Music out there!!

Okay, so my confession session is over but I have a story that combines them both together. I was taking a bath while little Smithy was sleeping and I put in the "Little Women" soundtrack. Oh dear. Amazing. I closed my eyes and smiled. Of course my thoughts took me to the beautifully made movie that I was basically raised on. I remember sitting next to the fire place at 1082 Via Verona Dr. Chico, CA on a Sunday afternoon, curled up in a blanket watching Winona Rider play the roll of Jo March and crying when Claire Danes, who plays Beth, dies, and always getting mad that Jo March didn't say yes to Laurie. Then I thought I have 3 sisters, which makes four of us. And there are four little women. Four of them, four of us. So I decided to say who each of my sisters would be and why.

Amy- Definitely Laura. Amy is eccentric and adventurous. She loves to socialize and wants to be involved. She is also very
Creative and fun.

Beth- Defintely Megan. She is more reserved and a little shy, loves to play the piano and is very sweet.

Jo- Not only is she my favorite character, but I relate with her the most. She loves to write fantasy and is curious of the
unkown. She loves to have fun. So Me!

Meg- Aubrey. She is responsible, mindful of everyone, she thinks about what is the best for those she knows. And is has
extremely good etiquette.

So those are my sisters. I love them. We, are all very different, but we all love each other.

Me and my sisters........

my wonderful sister in law

Alyssa is the one furthest on the left.

It goes Laura, Me, Aubrey, Meg.

Dryers

2009-10-22T09:55:00.000-07:00

When you have a back yard you decide to do funny things. Like hang your clothes up to dry instead of using the dryer. When I was serving my mission for the LDS church in the lovely Canary Islands, I never dried my clothes in the dryer, WHY? Because the people NEVER use them or own them for that matter. So you would see balconies of apartments chalk full of drying racks. I grew to appreciate dryers very quickly, BUT, today I wanted to hang my clothes dry. It was so fun and Smith liked it too.

Little Smith.

My Bryce wrote a song for Smith the other day, and as he was playing it I was holding that little bundle of joy in my arms and rocking him. I love Smith the way he is, and I accept how ever he turns out. HE saw the Geneticist, he is seeing the G.I. specialist, and he has a spinal tap coming soon. He has already gone through so much for such a young little boy. If any of you know Smith you know he has the sweetest spirit, as you hold him you feel heaven all around you. I get to feel heaven every day. I am lucky. Thanks Heavenly Father.

Dinner at Midnight

2009-10-20T11:49:00.000-07:00

I haven't eaten dinner at midnight since crazy nights with roommates at the rain tree apartments and probably other fun times with all my Chico friends as well. Anyway, my Bryce and I were unpacking all of our BOXES AND BOXES AND BOXES of stuff and I realized my tummy was rumbling for some food and my Bryce was pretty hungry too. As all of you well know, I love cooking and so my kitchen, of course, was the first thing to get completely established. Some set up the bedroom because they want a cozy place to sleep, some the bathroom so it wont feel so foreign, but me, I chose the kitchen to make my domain first. So I was all geared up to make my very first meal in my very first house.

We only had food that we brought over from the apartment. Good, a challenge.

So I mustered up Italian Rice with Cranberry Bourbon Steaks. It took me a little while to come up with a savory meal that sounded appetizing at 12 in the morning. A success! It tasted rich and delicious, especially after packing and unpacking and loading and unloading. I also bought some items at good ole' D.I. and "refurbished"... I had so much fun refurbishing old things and make them my own creation.

Now I wake up to the sound of whistling leaves on trees and birds, oh the beautiful birds!, and I must say, I do love it here. I really do.

Oh and by the way, I saw the movie "500 days of summer" with my best friend Courtney Lee Jones (C-Jones). I thoroughly enjoyed the movie and I enjoyed the soundtrack. Especially the song "sweet disposition." For those of you who appreciate clean flicks I would wait to see it on there, but it is definitely worth the wait. I loved it.

2009-10-12T10:42:00.000-07:00

I am a slacker in the Web World... but the real world I have been rather BUSY.

I am moving.

We are no longer basement apartment dwellers. When Bryce and I first married we managed a bed and breakfast and lived in the basement. I have nothing but fond memories of that little apartment. As my Bryce and I set up the rooms for the guests we would put cold sparkling drinks in each room and flirt and chase each other around the Mansion. Sometimes when no guests were there we would dwell upstairs and turn the fire place on and pretend we were Mr. and Mrs. Hines (it was called the Hines Mansion Bed & Breakfast) and play checkers in the front room. I loved that place. Then we moved to Bryce's Parents basement apartment to save $$. And we did. That is why we are moving. And I am so excited!!!!

No more footsteps above our heads, and window wells.

The house was built in 1944, is white with blue shutters, and has grape vines in the back yard. There is room for a herb garden and the house has wood floors through out.

Here are some ideas I have for decorating.

I like these wall papers

and I like this area rug because it tells a story

I love love love this couch

I like this wall

I like these pillows too.....

Of course these things are on my wish list. The rug however is from that dang cute store called Anthropologie, I believe it was around 1000 u.s. dollars. But I might find something close to it for less? Who knows. Doing the decor of a house is very satisfying and it's fun to make a house into a home. I love things that brighten and beautify. Moving here we come!

Warriors

2009-09-22T10:47:00.000-07:00

My sweet Little Little was laying on my bed in the midst of folded towels, folded jeans and pants, a couple of baskets of unfolded clothes and amongst all these folded and unfolded commodities were about 50 shirts stacked on top of each one with a hanger readily placed inside the shirt, waiting to be hung up.

As he was smiling and kicking and enjoying Smith Land, I looked at my Little Little and I told him how much I loved him.... I was thinking of a couple different things as I finished folding all the laundry......

The head nurse at his pediatrics office.

Just picture a bitter spinster/school marm, that is out to get YOU out of everyone in class.

That is the way I feel around this particular head nurse. When I first brought smith into the doctors office to get his circumcision (he was only 5 days old) she came in his room with her skin flexing in between her eyes exposing many wrinkles and asked sourly," Why did you name your son smith? Why?" I was thinking, it's really none of your business and you live in Utah don't you? I mean, kids come in with the name Wasatch or Avenue and you probably don't blink, but a boy comes in with the name Smith and you act as if it is the worst tragedy known to man.

Well, I called this special Nurse the other day to see if she could get me on priority for the geneticist at Primary Children's (normally it is a year wait with out a Doctor referral), and guess what she said?

"That is a normal amount of wait for a child, you will just have to call in and make an appointment." I bit my tongue and called into Primary Children's, and they said it would take about a year, then I asked, "with a Doctor referral can my son get in earlier?" They said "yes". Hmmmm...... I got a little perturbed and called the head nurse, this is close to what I said," Hi, this is Beth Taylor, mother of Smith Taylor. I called earlier about making an appointment with the Geneticist, and they told me if Smith's Doctor called in I could get in earlier. So I was calling to see if you could do that for me."

"We have already spoken, that is just normal to be put on a waiting list."

"Yes, but I don't think you understand, Whenever I come into your office I have to fill out a questionnaire regarding my son's development. Every single, EVERY SINGLE question it asks me, of pages of things your kids are supposed to be doing I mark, "Not Yet" . According to your standards he is still a new born and he is 16 months old. The neurologist has diagnosed him as a medical mystery, he has had cat scans, an MRI and developmental specialists in and out of my home for a year. I think you could call and put him on some priority, don't you think?"

"I can talk to Doctor Glade and see what I can do."

I now have an appointment in November for a neurologist, a G.I. specialist in October, and I am waiting on the Geneticist, but they told me I could get in soon, sooner than a year. My fingers are crossed.

I don't usually force my self onto people like that, but I did it for the love of my son. I felt good afterwards and I know Smith deserves a Mom that will put up a fight for him. I realized then more than ever, Moms are warriors and they have to battle everyday with decisions for their little ones. My "character" will have to change in order for Smith to get better. I can't be the easygoing and carefree person I am with life, but with Smith I have to be a warrior. A warrior that will battle and fight and try to figure out what he needs everyday.

"The formative period for building character for eternity is in the nursery. The mother is queen of that realm and sways a scepter more potent than that of kings or priests. "~Author Unknown

I am so grateful and honored to be the mother of Smith.

This story ends with me leaving the piles of laundry to get a glass of water in the kitchen and to my return all the shirts were found on the ground! I looked at Smith's smiling face and realized he had kicked them off. I shouted, "Yeah!!! You did something bad Smith! Your first "no no"! I loved it. I told him I want to see more "no no's" and I smiled and picked him up and forgot about the laundry while I played with my son.

Labor Day Weekend....

2009-09-08T16:03:00.000-07:00

As I sit and eat chips and cheese, a childhood favorite, I am reminiscing on the events of this weekend.

Some things for me to remember:

I love the game "BLURT", very fun.
Playing Texas Hold'm is much more fun when you play in a different character. Thanks, Lila.
Angels landing is beautiful, always
How much I love my friends.

Ummm... I pretty much had a blast this weekend, I didn't get much sleep but hey, what would you do?

I loved taking family pictures at the cabin.

The couples that came were so much fun to be with.

Elaine and Sebastian Bradley... their love story is amazing.

Mary and Klint Brearton, the fine couple that provides the beautiful cabin and scenery for us all to enjoy.

My Love's and I

Late night Texas Hold'm.... in character

The friends on top of Angels Landing, Zion National Park

Bryce and I holding on for our dear lives!!!!

Stop making me laugh....

Enjoying the view

I love Life.

Your Wrinkles

2009-09-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

I was driving and listening to the radio. Normally when I do that I block out the little blurps of news between songs, but a story caught my attention.

It was about a man and a woman both 101 years of age and married for, get this, 81 years.

The man died yesterday of old age holding his wife's hand.

It made me think of My Bryce and how much I love him, and how I would love to live to see him reach 101 years old.

I can just imagine intertwining our fingers and holding each other's wrinkly hands, walking down a path and chuckling about something like our dishwasher not working that day.

I will always be able to look into his eyes, no matter how old he is, and see the same beautiful hazel color as when we first met. I fall in love with him everyday and I am so glad I fell again today.

Thank you Sweet heart.

(Click here for the article)

Running....

2009-08-31T22:44:00.000-07:00

The sound of each foot pounding on the pavement, as your surroundings whoosh by your flowing body, you are one with your heaving chest rising and falling with every deep breath and you are left with your thoughts to last the trip.

I may be making running sound more glamorous than it really is. But as I run I like to make it a thought provoking time. I like to be my own therapist (when I run alone) and counsel myself in my current events.

Today I learned something as I ran.

It was a rather muggy day, and pretty hot too. If any of you run than you know after a distance you will start to drift a little to the right or a little to the left on the trail. This particular trail runs along a river and as I thought about how nice it would be to fall into the river "accidentally", without me noticing I would find myself close enough to actually fall in. I thought about how powerful the mind is and how much our thoughts can help us or drown us.

This lesson helped me want to keep my thoughts cleaner because I don't think i realize how many thoughts I might entertain subconsciously and how they are bringing me closer to the edge "with out me noticing it."

I am going to be better. For my family, the Lord, and Me.

Everyday.

The Comparing Disease

2009-08-27T10:23:00.000-07:00

Dear Women,

Hello all you beautiful creatures of this beautiful earth.

I ask you all a simple question.

Do you like yourself?

If you answered no, then I hope this letter will help you. If you answered yes, then this letter is especially directed to you.

I am going to tell a little story about Trianna.

Trianna is a beautiful woman who lives by her self on the island of Mooma. She was sent a nice young man to be her companion and she had some beautiful babies with him.

She never thought twice about her beauty.

She didn't know that other women existed. Until one day, two women around her same age were plopped down on the island.

She noticed they did things different.

One of the woman had red hair and had pale beautiful skin. One of the women had brown hair that was curly, she had beautiful brown skin. Trianna thought there was something wrong with her. They cleaned differently and more frequent then Trianna. So Trianna worked extra hard to clean like the two new beauties on the island. She found red berries in the bushes and tried to die her hair like the red heads hair. She noticed that the curly haired brunette had a six pack and calf definition. So she tried swimming and running as much as she could. All the while her children and her husband were telling her she was beautiful the way she was, and loved her unique domestic skills. THey told her to stop COMPARING!!!! But she never did and spent her whole life being consumed by the comparing disease.

Okay, Sad story. Right?

I live in Utah.

I love Utah. Beautiful Country.

But I see more of the comparing disease here then anywhere. EVER!

As women we have got to stop. We have got to embrace our uniqueness and love ourselves with greater passion. When we find ourselves, who we are as individuals, we then can find peace. And others will feel your inner peace and desire to be around you because they won't feel this competitive spirit around you.

It brings me to one of my favorite SCRIPTURES.

Proverbs 3:15 She is more precious than rubies: and all the things thou canst desire are not to be compared unto her.

Couldn't have said it better!

So to all you women who are reading this. You ARE more precious than rubies. You are not to be compared to.

Accept that you are a beautiful and unique person. When you start to compare is when you become the norm. Be different and blaze your own trail. Don't be Mormon Barbie...or just Barbie in general. I love you all.

Definitely NOT Margrette

2009-08-25T23:01:00.000-07:00

I looked out the window and what did I see?

NOT popcorn popping on the apricot tree....

A Spider.

Gross.

Why don't I like them?

Well, everyone tells me I should, mainly because they eat other bugs. What other bugs, do I ask? Cute little lady bugs, innocent flies, pesky mosquitos, and anything else that can get caught in there web.

I am feeling a tickle on my neck.... just a hair. It's all good.

So one very nice day, I looked out my window and I see a black wolf spider hanging out nonchalantly as if I wouldn't notice her new habitation. I tried to ignore her as the days went on, then finally I gave in and decided to name the darn thing.

Her name was Margrette.

Margrette started to grow on me and I didn't mind her as much as when I first discovered her. So one morning I looked out the window to see what good ole' Margrette was up to, and to my surprise a stupid, nasty, dumb, much larger spider was in her web. Margrette was no where to be found. He is brown and nasty and I am going to kill him. His hame is Willy and I don't like him. He ate Margrette. It's a spider eat spider world out there.

(I don't think you want to see the pics from this murder scene, I will spare your eyes)

Food Glorious Food

2009-08-20T21:04:00.000-07:00

Anyone who knows me, knows one thing for sure.......
I LOVE FOOD.
I love the taste, the smell, the sight, the sound, and my favorite - the process of making it edible, i.e. cooking. I can spend hours in the bathtub (while Smith is napping) getting lost in a cook book or one of my subscriptions to "Cuisine at Home". What can I say... I am unalterably addicted to cooking. I can't help it. But it helps me.

Cooking sweeps me away into another dimension. I find the world around me doesn't exist anymore and I am concentrating and figuring out the right....no.... the PERFECT amount of spice to add to a signature dish. And when my taste buds finally reach satisfaction and bliss, THAT, my friends, is when I can serve it to you, plated and hot.

I was thinking about making a separate blog about COOKING my culinary creations, but I decided that is one thing Bryce's Wifey does best, and happily so. So Do not be surprised to see a recipe that will knock your socks off every once in a while. But that brings me to a funny story.
My mom raised me on the phrase, "only boring people get bored." The first year of my Little Smith's life was a hard one, an amazing one, but a hard one. So while his little head would go to dream land during the bright afternoons, I would be up and around my house to entertain my self. I would paint, not often enough, read, talk on the phone, and...... enter recipe contests.

Entering the contests was mostly a fun thing and I didn't think anything would come from it. I entered a recipe contest in November of 2008 for "Mama Mary's Pizza Creations Contest." By the time March of 2009 came, entering the pizza contest was the furthest thing from my mind, but it was closer than I thought. I recieved a small manilla envelope from spartan foods, so I opened it and to my surprise I won! My "Three cheese Hawaiin pizza with red bellpepper alfredo" won! I got a year supply of free pizza crust coupons, and........ get this.... a coffee maker. YEAH!! The proud owner of the coffee maker is now my sister Laura who lives in Atlanta, thanks Lo. But anyway. It just goes to show, sometimes your talents can really add up to something. And maybe that something will land you free pre-cooked pizza dough that is ready for toppings and a hot oven. And really, enough coupons for a lifetime.... anyone want some?

Hubby's and Fathers

2009-08-18T10:50:00.000-07:00

Okay.

My hubby did something worth writing about.

He decided to take our little Smith on a father-son-outing.

Just him and Smith.

Smith cannot walk, he cannot talk, he cannot move like most little ones his age. But my Bryce, despite of what Smith can and cannot do, wanted to take him to the place that he loves second most to the home.

The Golf course.

I was nervous as I saw them drive off together because frankly I had never let just Smith and Daddy go alone, I was thinking about sharp turns that could be taken in the golf cart, or Smith getting too hot or too cold..... you know, crazy Motherly instincts we all have felt. But over all, I felt at peace. Knowing that Bryce really wanted to take him, just him, and spend some one on one time with his son, made me rejoice in Hubby's and Fathers.

Husbands are wonderful in themselves. They are there to hold you when you feel bad, they are there to kiss you on the forehead when you need comfort, they are there to smile at you when you have done good, they are there to play with you when you feel playful, they are there to love you all the time-despite that time of the month thing. And then you throw being a father in the mix.....SEXY! They have a whole new level of WONDERUL. You get to watch your hubby play with your children, hold those little wonders in their big arms, read them stories when he could be reading sports or the news, talk to them with a soft voice when normally they could sound manly, they have a whole new aura about them when they become fathers, and all you mothers can identify with this-they become more attractive, more manly, more gentle, more heroic, more of a.... A MAN.

Art Moves ME

2009-07-30T14:55:00.000-07:00

Art, in all forms, is a story.

A story tell itself to your heart and mind individually, differentiating itself by the person who is reading it. That is why I love art. It tells me a story with every piece I see. And in some cases they move me.

This Particular piece I painted myself, for my Brycey. It hangs over our Bed and takes me away to this balcony in a far off land every time I see it.

This is the story:

Once a upon a time.........

Girl (yes, her name is Girl) lived in a tiny shack in the corner of the village Ovorp. Girl was a goose herder by trade and loved tending her geese everyday with care and tried to block out her cruel and demanding boss. Girl lived with three women, Ymma, Yllsha, and Ayl; Ayl and Yllsha owned the tiny house on the corner. Girl and Ymma were best friends. Every night after a long day of work, Ymma and Girl would lay on their beds in their tiny room and talk as if they had been on an adventure that day, since Ovorp was so dusty and brown they pretended to be anywhere but Ovorp. They visited the tops of highest mountains, to the swamps and valleys of the land Zatacony. But their favorite place they spoke of and visited the most, were the Swan Islands. Their minds would be swept away as they described the trees and the smells of the Swan Islands; everything from the vibrant pink sunsets to the warm, clear blue lakes that were filled with floating lillies and dolphins. Now dolphins don't regularly swim in lakes but they did in the Swan Islands because their lakes were like mini oceans, with the floors of the lakes covered in starfish and soft, turquoise sea coral. But when they were, most likely every time, interrupted by Yllsha and Ayl with their high demands and yelling, they were brought back to reality to their dusty brown surrounding. Ymma told Girl,"One day you will find your prince and dance on the castle balconies of the Swan Islands."

On a hot summer day Ymma and Girl were tending the Geese, a dashing, funny, and sweet man named Esirb came to help them. He said he was sent by Ayl and Yllsha. Girl was very cautious at first, and didn't completely trust Esirb, but she was suprised how fast she fell in love with him. He found out through Ymma, Girls' hopes and dreams and Esirb saved every penny in order to take her away to the Swan Islands. In the middle of the night when the moon was full and high in the sky, he tapped on her window. She sneakily crept out her window to meet her prince, she wore a large grey cloak and left on a white horsecarriage with Esirb. But trailing close behind were Yllsha and Ayl. They didn't want to lose Girl because she paid all their rent. Then Esirb did something unexpected; he said three words......Shatz, Tesoro, LOVE!!! and off they flew towards the moon and into the lands of Swan Islands. Girl thought," you know magic too!!What a surprise! "

And that night they danced on the castle balconies in the Swan Islands. And lived happily ever after.

2009-07-29T13:58:00.000-07:00

Last night I held my Sweet Little Little (a.k.a Smith)

I was frustrated.

I was tired.

I was confused.

I asked Heavenly Father, Why?

Why is Smith different? What do I need to do? How can I best help him? Can he please sleep, can I please sleep.

Tears came to my eyes as I walked around my house in the wee hours of the night. I was talking to Smith and heavenly Father out loud. Hoping one of them would hear me and understand. As Smith dozed off on my numb shoulder I thought of the conversation I had with my sweet Bryce during the day before.

My Bryce said he felt sad for the first time about Smith. He watched a Dad with his son playing, and realized that might not ever happen with Smith. I told my Bryce I loved him, I kissed him and said, "you are the strong one, remember." He picked up Smith and held him close.

He is the strong one. He helps me and I help him. Today I helped him. And I loved it. We love our Sweet Little Little..... SO DARN Much!!!!

It made me think of one of the most influential talks I have ever read by one of the most beloved late apostles Joseph B. Wirthlin. It's called "Live in Thanksgiving Daily." The first time I read this talk was in the Canary Islands, serving my mission for the LDS church. I encourage all to READ IT.....SERIOUSLY, it will change your perspective on life. Here is the link.....just click and you are there.

“Live in Thanksgiving Daily”

Here is a quote from that very talk.

“The man who forgets to be thankful has fallen asleep in life”

I want to live everyday in gratitude and thanksgiving and I know I can. I love life and I love being happy about it... there are things that always make me live in the moment and i am going to name a few:

Seeing Smith Smile

My Husband's dashing good looks

Sitting on a porch in a warm summer sunset

Creeksides

Trees blowing in the wind

Warm Summer nights

Vacations with my family

Beautiful Art work

LOVe

The Gospel

I love all these things and more.....

I love you Smith, and Daddy loves you too.

2009-07-17T12:36:00.000-07:00

I am me.
Just Me.
It has been a while old friends of the blogging world. But I am here and well.
We had a family vacation to the Grand Mesa of Colorado.... too much fun, everything from orchards and cherries to lakes and forests.
Fun nights with my Bryce. And fun days with little Smithy
Two of my very dear and close friends are dating.... not other people, but EACHOTHER!!!
Sebastian and Elaine..... Two beautiful people make a beautiful couple, I love it.
Summer heat is the best, I feel totally comfortable in my skin during this time of year.
Smith is eating Solids!
I am not eating Gluten.
Bryce loves Taco Amigo.
And I love you all!
Sorry about the shabby updates. I am just having too much fun to be on the computer.... Garden here I come....YUMMMM!

2009-06-26T12:44:00.000-07:00

One of our cars is dead.
It just sits there, sad and lonely.
But, there is still stuff, good stuff, locked in the trunk of the dead car.
So one, not so sunny, afternoon, I went out to the dead car to see if I could somehow open the trunk with the old keys. With no avail, it would not budge. But, as I was walking back into my house, I was looking at the key chains and I noticed a key chain I had never before seen. I stopped and looked at it. It was brass/gold looking, with engravings and a little carving of Jesus' face. I read the engravings. It said,"BE GLAD FOR I AM IN YOUR MIDST."
I stopped.
I pondered.
I said it in my head about 3 or 4 more times,"be glad for I am in your midst."
Whatever negative, or stressful thoughts were swarming in my head at that moment or moments ago.....were gone. I was completely at peace, the kind of peace that is glad, with a slight smile on my face. To "BE GLAD". Being glad is a whole different emotion about life. The definition of Glad is :showing or causing joy and pleasure; especially made happy.
And all because He is in our midst.
His very presence causes a reason to be glad.
He is watching over us.
He is with us.
He wants us to be glad because he can lift any burden, ease any pain, love unconditionally, heal, bless, and be a comforting friend.
And that is something to "be glad" about.

In a Strawberry Daze

2009-06-24T15:30:00.000-07:00

The past week my husband and I decided to sell chocolate dipped strawberries at "Strawberry Days" in Pleasant Grove. Which is the fair. I don't really no why they call it the fair, because the prices seem so Unfair... well, I love the fair. I grew up in a town where the fair was, THE event. The smell of cotton candy, livestock, corn dogs, and occasionally, throw up. That doesn't really sound good does it? It makes a small town feel bigger, and a young girl feel adventurous, hoping to reach the "you have to be this tall to ride" sign one day. My Bryce took me on the zipper one night after we were done loading all of our goodies we didn't want stolen in the car. I screamed the whole time. I loved it! Even Bryce screamed.... of course to freak me out he rattled the cages while we waited for others to board into the horribly unsafe contraption in which we were flying and flipping through the air. Well, we sold a lot of strawberries and had fun doing it! While we sold strawberries during the day, our little one was being babysat. So Bryce and I got to hang out and work side by side. I enjoyed flirting with him and being his co-worker. We had sword fights with the skewers, dare each other to do things, drank lemonade, kiss when no one was looking(at least I think), laugh at each other, do impersonations, talk to people, bring up old memories and just goof off together. One day, in the afternoon, Bryce and I were sitting in our chairs behind our strawberry counter and a woman, with her daughter, who bought strawberries from us the day before, walked up to us and said,"Hi you two, I just wanted my daughter to meet you guys and show her how cute you are with each other, I just wanted her to see what she could have some day." I blushed a little and said how nice it was. It makes me go back to my first post and remember that you never know who is watching you.

Yummmmmmm...........

My Favorite flavor, Toasted Coconut.....

I love Strawberries!

Which one would you like? Oh, the chocolate graham cracker?...okay!

So Happy!

2009-06-09T21:23:00.000-07:00

I know Smith Feels Love.
Out of all the physical therapy we give him, Bryce and I decided the best therapy we give him is our simple love. Today we gave him a lot of love. Today was a FABULOUS DAY. My husband named it...."Celebration of our love Picnic Day." I know it sounds cheesy, but it's little things like that, that make Bryce.... Bryce. And I love him for it. He is the perfect Best Friend to have when I don't feel like being Joan of Arc, and more like a tired Jane Eyre. He is my knight in Shining Amour. Smith is my little Knight in Shining Amour, and I have faith that one day he will walk up to me and smile and say,"I love you Mom." Every time he uses all the strength he has to roll over (with a little help) he is my little hero. For all you Mom's out there that have a little tike running around or just laying on a blanket in the mean time, I want to tell you that you don't need a ton of credentials. You don't need a thousand books telling you what to do or how to teach your child. The parents I observe that really care for their children are the ones that just love LOVING there child. They don't think,"My Child has only learned to use sign language with 4 things this week, but Betty's child has already learned the alphebet." All I can say to that is,"oh dear," the mother that thinks this has to be some what disconnected to reality. Wake up and realize there are children ( probably like me) that didn't want to learn sign language and wanted to eat dirt instead... is there anything wrong with that? Is she really loving her child, or is she comparing her child? Because if she loved him then she would let him eat dirt and have him stuff her mouth full of dirt sometimes too. Anyway, I love all the Mothers out there that Love there Children. Because isn't that what life is all about?

Here are some pics from the Picnic:

Packing up Mr. Smith... oh WHAt FUn!!

My Sweetie Carrying our Picnic Stuff to the perfect Spot... So pretty

Of Course, eating Delicious Delectable Food.... YummY!!!

Reading books.... we have totally different tastes in reading material...love it.

My little Angel sleeping.... I guess it was too much fun.

We Love Him.....

And Enough said... I love you Bryce.

2009-06-01T10:47:00.000-07:00

THE ART OF KISSING.....
There are all types of kisses.
I will name a few:
Gross down your throat
Awkward head tilting
First kiss jitters
Gotta Run
Love ya
Passionate
Real Deep Genuine Love

There are a million more, but I am going to write about the "real deep genuine love" kiss, once upon a time.....
"Mom", I said with a questionable tone.
"Yes, what's up?" she answered.
"I started dating this boy, his name is Bryce, and him and I get along SOOO amazingly it's crazy, but I don't know if "it" is there"....
Before I go on further with the story, I have to explain what "it" is. "It" is everything! It's the passion, the romance, the attraction, the desire to be with the other person. If "it" is not there, sorry, then there is nothing. It was Christmas of 2005 and I had gone on 3 dates with Bryce Hal Taylor. I was visiting my Mom in Cedar City and I was feeling confused of how I was actually feeling for him. I had never felt more comfort and ease around a boy like I had around Bryce. I had never laughed so genuinely hard in my life, been spiritually fed, and had such a great time....but. I still didn't know if "it" was there. My mothers response was different then she had ever given me.
"Kiss him, and you'll know." she said.
This was not typical advise from my Mother, so I decided to rise to the challenge and give it a go.
My Bryce called me on my way back to Provo, Utah, and asked me on a date to watch "almost famous" and eat popcorn. I was excited to see him. We ended up watching the movie and playing thumb war, and during a very serious thumb war tournament, he got close to pulling me in and kissing me, but I shied away and laughed it off. It was time to take me home and we got in his car and he started to drive me to my house which was maybe 5 miles away. On the way he had me pick out a CD and I picked "Parachutes" by Coldplay. He looked at me, and smiled. He skipped to the song "Sparks" (Which is Our Song and please listen to it if you feel like being swept away for a minute or two). All of a sudden he pulled over the car to the side of the road about 2 miles from my destination. I was wondering what had happened, I really didn't know what was going on, I was clueless. And I looked over at him. Then he looked at me. Then he looked at his steering wheel. Then I looked down, then quickly back. Then his eyes met mine. Mine met his. He starting leaning towards me. I started leaning towards him. A perfect head tilt. Eyes closed and then.... the perfect kiss. The Perfect Kiss. "It" was there! I was drawn to him, the passion, the desire, the attraction, it was all there!

Now I get a chance to experience those kisses everyday. Kissing is important. I love kissing. I love the painting "the kiss" by Klimt.

It moves me everytime I see it.

My favorite kiss in a film Is the Kiss by Mr. Rochester and Jane Erye in the BBC mini series movie. I guess it is my favorite because they are best friends and they have so much passion for each other. YOU SHOULD SKIP TO 4:10. (4 minutes and 10 seconds into the clip)

If you wanna know if he loves you so....it's in his kiss, thats where it is.
And now I get to know he loves me, everyday.

Pleased to Meet Grandma

2009-05-28T21:20:00.000-07:00

As of May 27, 2009, the earths population is estimated by the United States Bureau to be 6,782,536,522. And out of that 6,782, 536,522 there lives in Provo Utah, a widow, who is my Grandmother. Elizabeth Josephine Smith. She is 83 years young, has stunning skin, and a beautiful mind for her age. My Bryce, Smith, and I have dinner with her every Monday. Why do we visit her every Monday? Because it is Family Home Evening. A night to drop everything and hang out completely in the present with your loved ones. My Bryce and I started this tradition early in marriage and it continues today. When I was younger I thought my Grandma was crazy. I have a fond memory of her visiting our family when we lived in Quincy California, which is all pine trees, hills and meadows. Beautiful. It was easy to visit nature, just step out your door and go hiking, you were in nature anywhere you turned. I was probably 7 years old when she decided to take her grandchilren for a little nature hike; as we hiked a long the sunlit trails of the forrest my Grandma stopped, faced a large pine tree, looked up at the majesty of height and beauty, took a deep breath, smiled, opened her arms, and HUGGED THE TREE. Then she said,"Come and hug the tree with me girls. Feel the love." I will never forget that experience. Later on in life when I heard the label "Tree Hugger" I always referred back to that experience with my grandma. I love her and she has been through a lot, her family has been through a lot. When I go to her house on Mondays, I try to leave all of that behind and just be there in the moment with her. Let her talk, let her repent out loud, let her. I believe People need People, No man is an island, no man stands alone. I need her as well, I have come to love my Mondays with her and I look forward to them every week. So out of the 6 billion something people that live in this world, I have found there is someway to find someone that you can learn more about and love more than you ever thought possible. That person for me is my Grandma Smith. What a surprise to find out how much I care for her. I love you Grandma Smith.

Pleased to Meet Smith

2009-05-27T15:37:00.000-07:00

Here is a Story about
a boy named Smith...
Yes, his first name is Smith and his last name is Taylor, not the other way around. I have had to explain that to many Doctors since little Smithy was born. It starts out with me saying,"Hi I am here for an appointment for Smith Taylor" then they say, "Okay, you can fill this paper work out for Taylor and sign right here." I then say, "No, his first name is Smith," then they say,"Oh, ha ha, I bet you get that all the time!"... then I think,"NO, my friends and family don't call him anything but his first name, "all the time" would imply everyday, but the only time he does have his name messed up is at the doctors, thank you." Okay, that was rude, receptionists are usually very nice and I really think it is FUNNY, that they get his name wrong, no hard feelings, promise. He has a different,distinct, and fun name, just like him, different, distinct, and fun. Smith's birthday is May 9, 2008, that makes him a little over a year now and he still has not rolled over,grabbed for anything, or learned to sit up on his own. He has a rare muscle disorder called Hypotonia, which disables him to use his muscles like most babies learn to do at a much younger age. He has about 10 different therepists working with him every month. Here is a list of some of them.

Paul- Occupational therapist
Kelly- Pysical Therapist
Dr.Sara Winters- Developmental Specialist
Holly- Vision Specialist
Michelle- Speech/language therapist
Dr.Glade- Pediatrition
Dr. forgot his name- Neuroligist

They are all amazing and I have grown a deep appreciation for them.
Last week, Smith had an M.R.I, in which they had to sedate him. Where was this nice little trip to?
PRIMARY CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL, in Salt Lake City, what an amazing place, there are Pictures painted on the ceiling and walls by children. It eases the pain to see such fun and energetic artwork by thousands of children. I looked up at the cieling in the M.R.I room and there was a painting of a little girl under a rainbow. The girl who painted the picture was maybe 4 years old. Even though the pictures are supposed to ease tension for the children recieving such tramatic procedures, I pictured my self as that little stick figure with a triangle dress standing underneath the rainbow while Little Smith was sedated and put into the large tubular machine to take pictures of his little brain. It is hard to see your baby laying in an odd shaped device with machinery all around. But I knew he was in good hands. I love him, he is my baby, sent to me, from God, from heaven, straight from heaven.

My Life, My Love, My Man

2009-05-21T14:21:00.000-07:00

This is my first post.... okay, I think I will have to start with my marriage to my Bryce. I love him. He is my hero in every way. I told my Bryce that, "marriage is when life truly started for me, everything before that just made me the person I am for you." And I really do believe that. I love all my friends and family that helped me become the person I am, and they all continue to help me everyday. I think I am going to start my blog with a very dear memory I had with my Bryce about 11 months into our marriage in August of 2007.....
We were at Macaroni Grill...... on date night, I LOVE DATE NIGHT!!!, and my Bryce had just gotten back from a "mini-tour" with his band. In all our 11 months of marriage my Bryce and I had never spent one night away from each other, and my Bryce had been gone for 11 days... which seemed like an eternity to me. So we were devouring each other at the dinner table, little kisses, loud laughs, my head resting on his shoulder, smiling, smiling, smiling, talking, talking, talking, holding hands and eating delicious bread and olive oil. I remember looking at him and thinking how it was possible for me to get along with someone PERFECTLY and have so much fun doing it. After we were done with our meal we were still talking, talking, talking when the waiter squeezed in between us and managed to plop down in front of us a delicious apple desert with two spoons. My Bryce said,"oh, we didn't order this...." Then the waiter leaned in and said in a quiet voice,"I am not supposed to tell you this but a couple here ordered this for you and paid for your meal..." as he walked off I was in shock. My Bryce immediately stood up and scoped the the crowd of people in the restaurant to maybe see if he knew the giver, but no luck, everyone seemed oblivious. My Bryce just shook his head in disbelief and looked at me and kissed me on the forehead then we both smiled and enjoyed our delicious dessert. Now, I don't know why this anonymous couple decided to pay for our meal, maybe it is a tradition of theirs, or maybe they just felt like it, but I like to think it was for a reason.... the reason being LOVE. I could see an older couple, looking at us from their seat, and going back to their early years of marriage, with FULL hearts, wide eyes, young, in love with out a care in the world on a random Friday night. I'd like to think they were touched by our simple love scene and overwhelmed with gratitude for all the years they have had, and decided to "Treat us" on our little night out.

Little did we know that same month the greatest surprise of our lives happened, we found out we were going to have a baby!......and the story begins........